Weekend Funnies

• Why don't men wear tight underwear?
  It cuts off circulation to the brain!
• Why do men have broad shoulders and big foreheads?
  
  
  
  
  When you ask them a question, they shrug their shoulders and say, "I don't know."
  When you tell them the answer, they slap their foreheads and say, "Ohhhhhh." 
• What is the difference between men and women?
  A woman wants one man to satisfy her every need........
  A man wants every woman to satisfy his one need
• How does a man keep his youth?
  
  
  
  
  By giving them money, furs and diamonds.
• Where do you have to go to find a man who is truly into commitment?
  A mental hospital. 
• What's the most common cause of hearing loss amongst men?
  Wife saying she wants to talk to him.
• Why are hangovers better than men?
  Hangovers will go away.
• How are men and batteries different?
  Batteries have a positive side. 
• Why does a man have a clear conscience?
  Because it's never used.
• What do UFO's and caring men have in common?
  You keep hearing about them but never see any for yourself.
• Why is dating like a game of cards?
  Because if you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand.
• How do you confuse a man?
  You don't have to - they're born that way
  
  
  
  
• Why women like bidets? Because men don't know what they are.
• What do you call a caring, considerate and gifted man?
  A Myth.
• How do you scare a man ?
  Sneak up behind him and start throwing rice.
• Husband: I don't know why you wear a bra; you've got nothing to put in it.
  Wife: You wear briefs, don't you? 
• What did God say after creating man?
  I can do better.
• Why do men want to marry virgins?
  They can't stand criticism.
•  What is the thinnest book in the world?
  "What men know about women." 
• How is an ex-husband like an inflamed appendix?
  It caused you a lot of pain, and after it was removed you found out you didn't need it anyway.  

 

SHAKIRA of "YOU ARE NEVER ALONE" hosts this wonderful weekend meme.

Weekend Funnies#8

April 30th- May2nd,2010

(Friday- Sunday)

Source: Jokes N Jokes.Net