Weekend Funnies

Excerpted from an article about a bank robbery which appeared in the Dublin Times (metropolitan edition, page 2A) on March 2, 1999:

...Once inside the bank shortly after midnight, their efforts at disabling the internal security sytem got underway immediately. The robbers, who expected to find one or two large safes  filled with cash and valuables, were surprised to see hundreds of smaller safes scattered throughout the bank.

The robbers cracked the first safe's combination, and inside they found only a bowl of vanilla pudding. As recorded on the bank's audiotape system, one said, "At least we'll get a bit to eat."

The robbers opened up a second safe, and it also ccontained nothing but vanilla pudding. The process continued until all the safes were opened.

They found not one pound sterling, a diamond or an ounce of gold. Instead, all the safes contained covered bowls of pudding. Disappointed, the robbers made a quiet exit, each leaving with nothing more than a queasy, uncomfortably full stomach.

The newspaper headline had read:

IRELAND'S LARGEST SPERM BANK ROBBED EARLY THIS MORNING

SHAKIRA of You Are Never Alone!!! hosts

Weekend Funnies (every Friday to Sunday)